


Pressure Point

by BaffledFox



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Bonds, Bottom!Gaara, Different prespectives, Drama, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Graphic battle scenes, Kidnapping, Lots of sex(probably), M/M, Mainly LeeGaa, Mission Fic, New Relationship, Political piece, Posessive Behavior, Romance, Top!Lee, Torture, slight world building
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-06-13
Packaged: 2018-06-08 20:59:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6873097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BaffledFox/pseuds/BaffledFox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There has been unrest between villages. Alliances will be made, broken, or cemented. Sunagakure and Konohagakure are trying to keep their alliance strong, Lee stationed as a liaison in Suna. The relationship he's building with Gaara seems to keep things stable between the two villages, but the same cannot be said for any others. </p>
<p>When there's an urgent need for Lee to go on a mission, Gaara is less than pleased to send him out. The plot thickens when Lee doesn't return home as scheduled. Gaara loses his rationality and mistakes are made. </p>
<p>{Long-fic, slow build, dabbling in the politics of the ninja-verse as well as building a stable relationship between two difficult people}</p>
<p>{Chapter long fic that should be updated pretty regularly} </p>
<p>{Other pairs will be added as needed, all pairs other than Gaara x Lee are background and sometimes mentioned or seen. Some chapters will feature the background pairs and be parallel to the main plot.}</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Together

**Author's Note:**

> Ah, thank you so much for joining me on my second Gaara x Lee fanfic! 
> 
> This one is definitely going to be longer and much more involved. I have a few other chapters written up, so updates shouldn't be too far between. I want to get some momentum going before I post the next, and feedback is extremely appreciated! 
> 
> Please enjoy, and if you have questions feel free to leave me a comment. You can also find me on tumblr under baffledfox if you'd like to follow me for updates or to chat. It would be a pleasure to meet others in this fandom and whom like the same pairs.

Gaara had entered the room, not making a sound. 

His sharp green eyes took in his environment, noticing the small details of their shared bedroom(though Gaara rarely slept here, even when he could get a few short hours). The space was mostly clean, the sheer curtains billowing open from the window Lee had left ajar. The room was dark, a wash of purples and inky indigo, highlighted by the silver of the moonlight peeking in. The only furniture was a small desk in one corner, a dresser in the other, some short book cases against one wall(stuffed with books from the library and some of Lee’s personal ones on Taijutsu along with his notebooks)and the bed that was against the farthest wall under a small port window. Gaara was mindful of the weights scattered on the floor, of the paper and ink brushes scattered beyond that(either he was penning a letter to Gai, or perhaps taking notes on his training, he couldn’t be sure because his eyes didn’t linger long). 

Gaara’s bare feet barely touched the ground as he moved, as agile as a desert fox, creeping closer to the figure on the bed. He absently unbuckled the holster for his gourd, the sound of the clasps absurdly loud in the quiet, but Lee didn’t stir(unusual for him, but he probably overtrained again, he was prone to that despite Gaara’s chiding). He eased the heavy gourd to the floor, leaning it up against the edge of the bed, the sand inside hissed quietly like an agitated snake. Next he shrugged out of his heavy black long coat, easing the thick fabric to the floor, the grey mesh top revealed beneath. 

The Kazekage had been too busy lately to visit Lee; and since their fight earlier in the week they had kept their distance from each other. Not that Lee ever wanted distance, but he learned to give Gaara time to think and cool down before he prodded at any other details. 

Gaara’s eyes were now rooted to his lover; Lee was wound around a pillow, his mouth slightly open, his long clumped eyelashes dark against the flushed curve of his cheeks. Lee’s sharply cut hair spilled like ink against the white of the pillowcase, mussed in a way it normally wasn’t. His fingers void of their usual bandaging, gripping hard at the soft pillow, creating deep indents that were shadowed under his face. His lean body was turned awkwardly giving Gaara a view of his long bare back, the blankets obscuring the lower half of his body(which was also most likely bare of clothing). 

Lee’s skin had bronzed from hours spent in the desert sun, the shock of milky scar tissue breaking up the firm flesh, forcing Gaara’s eyes to trace the patterns though he had seen them thousands of times before. Lee’s body was a testament to his progress as a shinobi, a proudly used weapon; the bumps of healed broken bones, the knots of twisted skin healing around a deep puncture wound, the precise scar pattern of many blades, the geometric shapes of long removed stitches. 

Lee’s imperfections are what made him beautiful, vulnerable, and human in a way that Gaara simply could not be. 

He often watched Lee sleep, in the early hours of the morning(when he could spare the time), but tonight was different. In eight hours Lee would be sent out on a recon mission, the first since they had become a couple(and the first that Gaara would not accompany him on). It was merely a B rank mission, but with the influx of activity lately, the hidden villages had been more on edge. Gaara couldn’t spare himself for anything under S rank, and lately the biggest adversary he’d been facing was politics. The allies had requested council, there had been another attack, and they needed to get to the bottom of who it could be. 

The attack had happened on the edge of fire country, which made it a Konoha issue. Suna was Konoha’s strongest ally, and it made sense to send Lee to rendezvous with their leaf nin. Lee could cover Suna territory beyond the border, and the other shinobi could cover Konoha’s side or they could overlap if necessity called for it. It didn’t matter if it was logical, however, Gaara still didn’t want to send Lee anywhere, not without him. 

This hadn’t been the first attack, but it was the most recent. So far they couldn’t come to any real conclusion on the connection or why it was happening. It could just be a rogue group, or it could be something as basic as bandits. Either way, it was a mystery because it seemed the enemy was just wasting resources, scare tactics maybe, but there had to be a reason they were doing it. They were trying to draw away from the big picture, somewhere there was a connection to someone or something, but so far the threads of the plot kept slipping right through his fingers. It was frustrating, and it kept Gaara on edge. He had a lot he wanted to protect, but the enemy so far was invisible and it was starting to make him jump at ghosts; it was forcing a fear in him that made him want to lash out. 

The sand in the gourd reacted to his mood; licking against the inside of its container, louder than the cicadas just outside the window. 

Gaara concentrated on his breathing, forcing himself back under control, slowly unwinding the tension that had forced his hands into fists before he eased himself down onto the mattress. 

“Gaara…?” It was hardly a question, Lee knew who it was, his dark eyes blinking Gaara’s silhouette into focus, noticing the hard edges of his lover, the way his arms were drawn defensively over his chest. There was a wrinkle in his brow that crumpled the kanji above his eye, and his sandstone lips were pinched downward at the sides. Gaara looked stern, his eyes hard, he was thinking about something, worrying probably. Lee had gotten good at reading the other man, seeing beyond what Gaara outwardly portrayed. He shifted his weight until he was lying on his back, his arms reaching over his head as he casually stretched, aware of the charge on the air(it could still be a dangerous thing to startle Gaara when he was in these moods). 

“I could send someone else.” Gaara said without prompt, his tone as flat as a granite slab. 

The mission. Right. Lee’s sleepy brain began to wake up, realizing he had just been tossed into a field full of landmines. They had known about this for about a week, but today was the day, and it was clear Gaara still didn’t want him on active duty, not without him, anyway. They had this argument the moment Konoha had sent summons for him. Despite the Kazekage’s attempts at intimidating him, Lee hadn’t backed down, this was just something they’d need to deal with. Danger was part of their lives, and they couldn’t always be together. They had to face life head on! Hiding under a rock would get them nowhere, and despite Lee’s prowess in battle, and his abilities he had shown Gaara again and again the redhead still treated him like a fragile thing. 

Lee wasn’t going to change his lifestyle, his shinobi career was what he had trained so hard to attain, and he still hadn’t made it to the top yet. Deep down he knew Gaara didn’t want Lee to give up what made him happy, and he could understand the helplessness the Kazekage felt towards the situation. It was the same feeling Lee felt when Gaara took a dangerous mission without him(though rare these days), but they couldn’t keep each other in a bubble, they had to embrace the risks to appreciate the rewards of life! 

Lee knew Gaara’s concern was well-intended, but he couldn’t submit to his whim, not for something like this. He was still loyal to his village, and to Suna, Gaara understood that(deep down). He also knew Gaara didn’t think he was incapable; it was the fact that Lee had become an extension of Gaara. Just like the people of Suna, or his siblings, Lee was something important to him to protect. If Lee died, a piece of Gaara would die as well, and he knew that it was this fear that caused the Kazekage to be irrational at times. It was also the reason Gaara took S-rank missions and would accompany his troops; he didn’t want any life to be lost, and it was a noble goal, but it was also almost impossible to achieve.

There would always be these unknowns in their life, and Gaara couldn’t save everyone. 

The mission was B rank, and merely recon. It was one of the safest missions he could have gotten in his grade. It also was still within both Suna and Konoha territory, ample back up close by. Gaara was just overreacting, though how to tell him that without being rebuked? 

“It was assigned to me, and I can handle it.” He said slowly, pushing himself up into a sitting position, the thin white blanket pooling in his lap, “I’ll be fine. I’ll do my best for Konoha and for Suna. You have my word.” He said with a flashy grin, hoping to ease the static from the air with his positivity. 

Gaara didn’t answer, his eyes had dropped to Lee’s exposed chest, following a long scar that went from his left shoulder to his right side, blade wound, his nipple was missing where it cut through; infection, he remembered when he got that. His sharp gaze followed other, older scars, criss crossing here and there, a knot of skin puckered on his hipbone, his shoulder, just under his heart. Lee’s body could tell him all the stories he needed; that this man had faced death more than a few times, he had been pushed to the edge, and also that he had survived time and time again. It wasn’t luck(Gaara didn’t believe in that), Lee was strong, capable, a perfect tool. 

But, he was still human, and still obscenely fragile. 

Lee had limits, and they had been tested many times. Gaara in his youth had almost killed him twice, and Lee almost didn’t recover from the injuries he had given him. There was a prominent stitching scar under his left forearm, the twin(though Gaara couldn’t see Lee’s legs because of the blanket) under his left shin where Gaara had crushed the muscle and bone to pieces with his sand. 

Gaara wanted to protect his village, his people, his siblings, and Lee above all else. 

The emotion between the groups were different, they had a ranking in his mind that had seemed logical(before Lee). His people came first, their village home came second, his siblings came third(they were often in the line of fire). But, then there was Lee, and he had outranked everything and everyone else. Which wasn’t correct, couldn’t be correct, because one person should not be above thousands of other lives. This problem was something he pondered most nights when he was alone in his office, trying to puzzle out the details of why, trying to carefully put his few emotions back in their respective boxes(though this never seemed to work, Lee always provoked them back out again, making his brain short circuit). 

But, no one, not his siblings, not even Naruto, had gotten as close to Gaara as Lee had. 

Lee felt like another limb, he was so intertwined with him that he felt when Lee wasn’t there, an ache so deep it rattled his bones. He had affected Gaara in a way he hadn’t been affected before, and he was usually in his thoughts even if he didn’t want him there. Shukaku often whispered of danger, of weakness, of blood and death. In the early hours of the morning, when the village was quiet, it was all Gaara could hear. When he slept(for a scant hour or two) he was fed visions of himself killing Lee, in various ways. Those dreams were dark and real, and Shukaku would nudge his brain, would tell him to do it when he was awake, to get rid of this weakness, to make himself strong again, to put his thoughts back in logical order. The world didn’t make sense anymore with Lee in it, it was just so different Gaara still was having a hard time adjusting. 

It made sense, in a way, to force the pain of loss so he could deal with it and move on. But, if he focused on that too long it began to hurt, worse than anything before. He would think of Lee dying, not by his hand, but just by someone else’s on a mission, or even just by accident, and it would feel like all the air had been sucked from the room. In those panics he would rush to their room to see Lee, to touch him, to make sure he was still alive and real. He knew he couldn’t kill him, and he also knew that he couldn’t let him die. He felt he needed to protect him, but Lee was stubborn and wouldn’t let him protect him(not all the time, especially not from the shadows of Gaara’s imagination). 

Lee felt like he was in the eye of the storm, a battle was being waged just beyond him, in the depths of Gaara’s eyes, watching as the other man looked at him, his gaze roaming like a hungry wounded thing. He could hear the sand roiling in the gourd by the bed, a sign to Gaara’s shifting mood, the static still in the air, almost palpable, fluffing the edges of his hair. “Gaara.” 

Gaara didn’t stop staring, and he didn’t respond. 

Lee knew this would happen; for as indifferent as Gaara tried to be about the subject initially, to their brief standoff about it later, it had only been a front to try and cover the brewing storm beneath. He reached up, his hands cupping Gaara’s face(distantly Lee had heard the cork on the gourd pop free, the sound of it rolling across the floor was loud and menacing accompanied by Gaara’s hurried breaths), “Look at me,” The sand hadn’t risen to defend its host, Gaara was still semi-aware(which was a good thing), his jade eyes finally lifting to meet his own, “I understand you’re worried. I don’t know exactly what’s going on,” It wasn’t his place to know anything beyond the mission he was given and any direct information involving that, “But, I know it’s big. I know how to defend myself and I’m smart enough to fall back when I have to.” Which, was admittedly a new compromise, since Lee usually went all out with everything he did. “I won’t take any unnecessary risks, I’ll only be gone a--”

“I know how long you’ll be gone.” Gaara said, his tone still flat, not yet washed with anything other than his usual indifference, as if the conversation and the situation wasn’t affecting him. Lee knew better of course, Gaara’s chakra wouldn’t be fluctuating this bad if he was under complete control. “I have the mission scroll on my desk.” 

Lee was trying to be reassuring, either the notion went over the Kazekage’s head, or Gaara just didn’t want to hear it. His hands fell, gliding down Gaara’s neck to rest flat on his shoulders, knowing touch usually kept Gaara grounded(it seemed to be working today at least, what time was it anyway?). “You need to believe in me,” He said seriously, leaning into Gaara’s space, “I am going to be the best shinobi I can be, that is my goal, so I can protect my villages, protect you and all my loved ones. You need to let me do this.” 

Gaara was quiet, his turbulent gaze still on Lee’s face, “I don’t like it when you’re not here.” 

Lee’s expression softened, “I know.” 

“It hurts.” He said, his expression still serious, though it seemed the sand was settling, and the aura around the Kazekage was abating. 

“I’m sorry, Gaara.” Lee said sincerely, finally deeming it safe enough to embrace his lover, crushing him against his chest with his usual youthful vigor. He didn’t like hurting Gaara, and he also didn’t like being away from him; but this was something they’d get used to. Thousands of active duty shinobi did this every day, the pain of loss was nothing compared to the happiness they brought each other, they could tackle this and anything else together! 

Gaara had clung onto Lee, his hands touching the naked skin of his back, his chin propped on his broad shoulder. He was staring ahead at the slightly open window, watching the shadows dance along the walls like living things where the curtains continued to billow. “It’s different, the pain.” He continued, “With my siblings...I send them away, and I know they may not return, and it agitates me, but I don’t feel this intense pain with the thought of it. With you, it’s different. I can’t imagine it, the world how it was, before you were here.” 

The admission was both good and bad; Gaara was moving forward steadily, but he was also trying to stay inside the safe good feelings instead of embracing all of it. He was afraid of feeling bad again, and it was a reason they were struggling together. It was clear the Kazekage wanted Lee safe and always there with him, but it wasn’t in his nature to be a caged bird. Gaara did accept that, but it was a hard thing, for both of them, to be without the other and knowing that one day they wouldn’t make it home. 

But, it wasn’t a situation unique to them, and they had to remember there were others in the world, people much more important than just them. Every active duty shinobi dealt with this issue; leaving someone behind, and it didn’t stop anyone else from truly living, so they couldn’t let this stop them.

“I know, Gaara.” Lee said gently, feeling the brush of rough red hair against his face, his hands pressing along his lover’s tense back, fingertips catching in the mesh of his shirt. “Life is beautiful this way.” 

“Beautiful?” The sound of the word seemed to roll on the other man’s tongue, as if he didn’t understand, or maybe just didn’t like the way it tasted.

“Life is meant to be experienced passionately. Pain, heartache, love, happiness,” Lee continued to rattle off emotions, his voice rising in pitch as it often did when he was about to make a speech or just to underline a strong point, “We knew what this would mean when we got together. We would experience all these things, stronger than ever before, and it will mold us, shape us into the best men we can hope to be! We will take everything that life hands us, and we will always do our best with it. This is what life is, you have to experience it all at once or not at all. I don’t fear death Gaara,” As a shinobi that was a given, but he hurriedly continued, “You give me a new perspective, the love I have for you, and the love you have given me, it pushes me forward and I will cherish this, I cannot fear death because you have helped me live life to the fullest!” 

Lee’s voice seemed to vibrate off the walls, Gaara could feel the passionate fist he had made against his spine, could almost feel the energy prickling on Lee’s skin. 

Lee nervously smoothed his hands down Gaara’s back, looking off to the side; he had a point somewhere in his speech, he thought he did, but maybe he didn’t get it across as well as he thought. Maybe he should he start again, or maybe he should--

“I understand.” The Kazekage intoned slowly. 

“Ah,” Lee blinked back to attention, just holding the sand shinobi against him, “Good. That’s, good then.” 

“I don’t regret us.” Gaara said after a moment in that same quiet monotone, “I do not want to hold us back.” 

Lee quickly jerked Gaara back in front of him, his hands on his shoulders, Gaara’s hands on his chest(a reflex to ward him off, but he ignored the scowl the man gave him, ‘don’t startle me’ had been clear without him stressing the statement). “Good!” That was exactly what he had been trying to say to the Kazekage since they had gotten together. Gaara had made such strides, he had become the village leader despite the stigma he had before, he had become a person to be proud of. This was a pivotal moment between them and Lee couldn’t help his bright smile that almost seemed to sparkle in the low light, “You make me very happy, Gaara.” 

Gaara had looked away from him again, the crinkle back in his brow, his fingertips just lightly touching the hard muscle of Lee’s chest. 

“Was there,” Lee started, tilting his head, the mussed black hair favoring one side of his face, “Something else you wanted to talk about?” 

“You’re going to be gone.” He said after a moment of hesitance. 

“Yes, but I--” 

Gaara added before Lee could continue, “I’ll miss you, and I…”

Lee flushed slightly, smiling at Gaara and gently he lifted a hand to touch his face, to guide it back to him so they could properly look at each other. The Kazekage’s green eyes weren’t as hard as before(Lee would probably be the only one to notice such a subtle difference), “I’ll miss you too.” Lee leaned in for a kiss, pressing their lips together and feeling Gaara’s fingers press a little harder into his chest. He pulled back after just a moment, keeping things chaste, watching as Gaara’s tongue chased over his lower lip, his green eyes hooded when he looked at him again. 

“I want…” The Kazekage started in the same dry monotone, “I want to be closer to you.” 

At first Lee didn’t entirely understand, they were extremely close now, their bodies just a few inches apart, breathing the same air, touching each other(innocent as it was currently). The leaf shinobi was still a little slow on the upswing of their relationship and the deeply physical side of it had been a relatively new occurrence. Lee had never been prone to perversion and in his youth he dealt with natural physical urges like most unwanted things, by training so hard he forgot about them. It didn’t mean Lee wasn’t a touchy feely person, he definitely was, but hugs, gentle touches, and soft kisses were completely different than the passion they had experienced a few times since their relationship had begun. 

Thinking about that now, and factoring in his mission, the gears in Lee’s head began to turn and his face was growing hotter by the second. “Do you….?” It was always awkward to ask, and he had gotten better at reading Gaara, but Lee was still not used to the fact that Gaara found him attractive, or wanted him in that way(not just taking into account that this was Gaara of the desert, and before Lee, had never touched anyone on purpose if you didn’t count forced polite greetings). 

Gaara didn’t answer, instead he pushed at Lee’s chest and the other man fell back on the bed; the Kazekage climbing into his lap, his expression still serious. 

Lee’s hands were bracing on the redhead’s hips, holding him steady, or maybe just grounding himself as his dark eyes looked up the slender(and still clothed) figure of his lover. Yes, this was definitely about to happen, and this position was new. Lee was already aroused from waking up(Which was natural! A man’s body experienced certain things in the night, and this problem could be easily solved with a run around the village, though it appeared it also could be solved another way). “Gaara.” Was all Lee could really offer, not really a question, or a statement, or anything more than a breath of the Kazekage’s name. 

Gaara remained straddling his lover, leaning back a little as his fingers hooked under the mesh of his shirt and yanked it over his head(ignoring Lee’s sharp intake of breath). After, Gaara leaned back down, his hands roaming over his scarred chest to feel up to his throat before he took Lee’s face in his hands and guided their lips together. 

Gaara still wasn’t that good at kissing, he forced Lee’s lips open with his tongue, demanding, mostly teeth that bruised Lee’s mouth. But, the pain felt good, and it was always amazing to have Gaara kissing him at all(even if it was sloppy, and Gaara’s nails had started to dig into his face). Lee let his hands drag up the Kazekage’s body, calloused fingertips roaming over unblemished creamy skin, groaning into the kiss as he tilted his head to give Gaara better access. 

Gaara ground his hips down, feeling the bulge of Lee’s arousal under the bunched blankets. His body trembled at the feeling of Lee’s hands touching his bare flesh, always feeling excited and vulnerable in these moments. With Lee, like this, giving in to the urges of their bodies, he could feel human, and he could feel connected to the other shinobi. There was always so much, too much, running through him when they did this, one hand ran up Lee’s face to grab his hair, twining into the soft black strands and fisting them between his fingers. 

Lee arched up into his lover when Gaara pulled his hair, the kiss deep, passionate, and loud. Gasping for breath between needy bites and greedy tongues, this was quickly overloading his barely awake body and he could only think he wanted more. 

But, there was the prickle of danger too, under the current of obvious heat; Gaara’s mood was fluctuating, as deadly as a storm, emotion flowing through the Kazekage in a way it was hard for him to process all at once. He could feel it, the tremble under his skin, could almost breathe the electricity on the air and vaguely could hear the sand whispering across the floor. 

Their first time had been disastrous because Lee hadn’t the foresight to pay attention to this; he had almost been crushed by sand as a result, and Lee definitely was more aware now since they had done this a few times since then(though from that result, it was a reason Gaara rarely engaged, still a little afraid). 

Lee broke the kiss and in the same motion rolled their bodies so Gaara was sprawled under him(his hand still stubbornly in his hair, the other still against the pulsepoint in his throat). Subtly he had used this distraction to glance towards the sand which creeped across the floor like a living thing, though halted at the edge of the bed, just lashing there. Good, it meant Gaara was aware of it too, was keeping some control. 

Lee’s attention immediately pivoted back to his lover, his lips finding his jaw, his neck, placing open mouthed kisses against the skin that forced Gaara to gasp those sweet breathy sounds. One hand he used to brace on the side of Gaara’s head, the other roamed down his lover’s chest, over his abdomen, and lower still to pop the button on his pants. He was eager, it had been weeks since they had been intimate, and he was leaving in a few hours. He wanted to enjoy his lover, but he also just wanted to be in him, and it was difficult to slow this down. Lee bit a little harder at Gaara’s throat, the sand lept up(but didn’t come on the bed), and the Kazekage arched into him, a barely there moan wrenched from his lungs. 

“Lee.” Gaara said his name in that way he only did when they were in the bedroom and it went straight to Lee’s dick. 

Lee yanked at Gaara’s pants, just as he nipped along Gaara’s collar, the Kazekage obediently raising his hips so the other man could force them down(Gaara doing the rest by wriggling and using his legs and feet to kick off the offending fabric). He settled between Gaara’s legs, gently nudging them apart with his knees as he leaned back(the redhead reluctantly letting go of him to lay out on the mattress). He took in the sight of Gaara, his skin flushed, his green eyes soft and endless, his lips wet and swollen, his neck littered with angry red marks(good thing he normally wore those high collared coats). 

“I want you to think of me.” Gaara said, his voice deeper than usual, tempered with a velvet undertone. 

“I always do.” Lee said, one hand roaming up Gaara’s hairless leg, touching at his hip and up his side, his other hand moving along his inner thigh, fingers brushing against the soft skin of Gaara’s obvious arousal(eliciting a pleasent sigh from his lover). Gaara looked gorgeous under the moonlight, his skin seemed to glow, he almost didn’t look like a real thing; even the dangerous sand glittering off to the side of his vision couldn’t dispel the hold Gaara had on him. Lee loved this man so much, too much, his heart was full to the brim with passion; Gaara could plainly see that on his expressive face and in those black eyes when their gazes locked. 

“You will come back to me.” Gaara said, though the threat in his voice was offset by the softness of his eyes; his red hair like blood haloing around his head, messy against the white of the pillows and giving him a vulnerable veneer. 

Gaara was dangerous, but it was hard to remember that, even with the sand, even with the storm brewing on the air from the Kazekage’s turbulent emotions. When the sand shinobi was beneath him like this, he looked so small, his limbs corded with tapered muscles, his skin as soft and milky as a child’s. Gaara’s body didn’t look like it had ever been in battle, and without the physical exertion that came with holding a weapon, or dodging an attack, the Kazekage looked like any high born civilian; softly edged, almost feminine. 

Though, that was merely an illusion, this vision beneath him was not an innocent youth. 

Gaara had killed his first man when he had been a toddler, and the body count he currently had was extremely high for a person his age. He may not look as bulky as Lee, or as scarred(at all), but he had blood on his hands, he was a weapon just as any shinobi was, and there was a time when Gaara’s murderous tendencies was the only thing that defined him. 

“I will.” Lee said, even though it was dangerous to make promises like this, a shinobi’s life could not be guaranteed from day to day, and Lee’s natural determination and spirit wouldn’t save him from the steps of death no matter how much he’d want to return home if he was bested by an enemy. “I’ll always return to you.” He said anyway, leaning over Gaara, his hand on his hip to keep him steady(where he had lifted him slightly to get a better angle as he gently rocked forward), his other hand reaching beneath the pillows to grab at something underneath. Lee’s movements were slow, deliberate, as he often was during their intimacy so not to startle Gaara. 

His eyes were like two shards of jade, watching his lover as he moved, noticing the muscles shifting under his worn skin, hearing the rasp of the sheet under Lee’s fingers and the shift of the pillow as it pressed against his cheek as the other shinobi fished out the lube. Gaara wanted to be pleased by Lee’s admission, the leaf nin never broke his word, and thus far had always returned from missions. But, the remnants of old wounds told Gaara sometimes Lee had barely made it back home, and even further still, the images of a younger Lee being crushed by sand infiltrated his mind. 

Lee could see the thoughts swirling behind Gaara’s eyes, the pinch of his lips told him he was being drawn from the moment, and that soon the Kazekage would go back to being closed off and volatile. He had to step carefully, though it was difficult to think with an erection(it had been weeks, his mind unhelpfully added), it was clear one wrong move or one wrong word could set Gaara on the defensive and this fragile bond they had started to build again would break down. “Gaara.” He spoke softly, waiting until Gaara’s roaming gaze lifted back up to his face, “I have you to live for. To fight for. I’m not going to throw this away.” It was his way of saying he’d be cautious, he’d fall back if needed, he wouldn’t run to the front of the line like he used to. He wasn’t living for himself anymore; and where he’d give his all for the mission, and his comrades, Gaara was always at the back of his mind. 

Gaara’s face would look expressionless to the outside observer; but Lee knew better. He could see the cracks just under the surface, and the sand had started to move again, no longer just hovering. It was hissing across the floor, curling around the edges of the bed, it had actually creeped under the edges of the sheet. 

Lee’s heart started to beat a little faster, but the danger hardly abated his passion he had for the man beneath him; Gaara was always dangerous, he hadn’t expected their relationship to be any different. “Gaara.” He said again, a little more firmly this time, popping the cap on the bottle and one handedly twisting the small vial upside down to smear the warming oil on his fingers. He had gotten good at it, because Gaara often needed constant touch to keep himself grounded(Lee’s other hand smartly kept roaming from Gaara’s hip, to his inner thigh, to against his erection which still stood proud; though the Kazekage wasn’t showing much reaction to the touches, but Lee knew it was the thing keeping the sand quiet). 

His fingers glistened wetly in the moonlight, the bottle discarded in the blankets as he rocked his hips up, the back of Gaara’s thighs against the hard muscle of Lee’s legs. Carefully, he swept his hand under Gaara, pressing his fingers along his crease before he drew them to Gaara’s center. He held his breath the entire time, watching Gaara closely, his body hyper aware of the situation and knowing how quickly it could turn. Lee wasn’t stupid enough to croon words of love at the Kazekage, the word ‘love’ itself was a hot button for the redhead(ironic as that was since the kanji on his forehead stood for the word and Gaara had to see it in the mirror everyday). He knew that talking Gaara from the proverbial ledge was something that took finesse, and he had gotten rather good at it since they started this rocky relationship. 

Pain was a trigger for Gaara, which was why Lee was taking things so slow. He exhaled slowly as he pressed the first digit against Gaara’s opening, waiting until he relaxed(which was a good sign, it meant he still wanted this) before he pushed further. This would be a slow process, and Lee’s body was aching(in more ways than one, his nerves stretched to their limit as he tried to keep focused on everything in the room). 

“I’m yours,” Lee said, unprompted, “You know I’m yours. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you.” 

Gaara’s eyes warmed(just a little), the hold he had on the sheets abating as he relaxed further, tilting his head on the pillow to look at Lee. The sand shinobi was a possessive beast, and it appeared that Lee had stroked just the right spot to start to pull Gaara out of his bad thoughts and get him to focus back on the now. 

His finger had pressed in to the knuckle and he bit back a groan when Gaara clenched around him; he wanted badly to be inside. He was so wound up he would have let Gaara fuck him, would have rolled over happily if this meant they could just be closer already, but he knew that would have been pointless. Gaara had never tried to top him, the Kazekage had been adamantly against it; but it made sense, it took so much focus for Gaara to allow Lee to do this to him, that if he was to dominate him, Lee could understand why the redhead would think he’d lose control of himself. 

Lee hoped one day he could help Gaara get over that fear, to show him he wouldn’t hurt him like that; but today wouldn’t be that day. 

“I need you Gaara.” Lee said, another stroke to Gaara’s insecurity, an affirmation that his existence mattered to someone. He withdrew his finger before pressing back in, in slow deliberate strokes, watching his lover’s face the entire time and feeling a rush when the Kazekage closed his eyes and breathed through his mouth. 

Good, this was very good, Gaara was giving into the pleasure, he was settling back down. 

On the third stroke Lee pressed a second digit inside and had to bite his lip from moaning when Gaara arched up and gasped; his fingers digging back into the sheets and twisting(the white knuckled grip and the quick turn of his hands reminded Lee of when Gaara would direct the sand into a solid ball before his hands would close and explode whatever was trapped inside). He gently stroked the warm passage, curving his fingers to seek out that spot inside of Gaara that would--

“Ahn...nn…” Gaara moaned, his cock twitched from the pressure on his prostate, the tip wet with precum. 

Lee shuddered, trying to maintain control, counting backwards from a thousand in his head to keep himself from trying to just take what he wanted. He wasn’t normally a patient man, but being with Gaara had definitely deepened his reserves. He couldn’t even be bothered by the sand that had finally snaked around his ankles(having lurched forward when Gaara had been assaulted with startling pleasure). 

Lee drew his fingers back again, adding a third, seeing the crease to Gaara’s brow, obvious discomfort as he clenched down on him but didn’t try and push away. A bead of sweat dripped down Lee’s temple to his chin, his body as taut as a bowstring as he slowly shoved his fingers in and out of Gaara’s ass. 

Gaara’s breath had hitched, barely there sounds passing his lips as he yanked at the sheets. 

Lee could feel the pressure of the sand on his ankles, creeping up to his calves, but doing nothing more than touching him, the deadly intent absent. His eyes remained rooted to the Kazekage writhing beneath him, he looked so damn beautiful, he didn’t think he’d ever get over the sight. That this side of Gaara would only ever be seen by him; it added to the pleasure, like a guilty aphrodisiac. 

He hooked his fingers, with each intrusion he made sure to pass over Gaara’s prostate, again and again until the Kazekage said his name in that way that shattered all rational thought. 

Lee couldn’t wait anymore, he just couldn’t. He withdrew his fingers as slowly as he could manage, noticing when Gaara’s eyes opened just enough to look up at him, the dark black shadows around his eyes causing the green to look almost surreal. He lined himself up with Gaara’s prepared opening, easing himself inside, trying to keep his pace even but it was a damn struggle. 

His stomach muscles clenched, his back ached as he bent over his lover, trying to keep himself controlled; he pressed his oil slicked hand just above Gaara’s shoulder for balance, his other hand still gripping hard(harder than intended) at Gaara’s hip to keep the other man angled perfectly. His lips pressed to Gaara’s collar, up to his throat, mouthing against the skin there as he tried to breathe. 

“Lee.” Gaara said, right in his ear, causing the leaf shinobi’s hips to jerk unintentionally, seating himself a little further inside and causing the Kazekage to gasp(which hardly helped things). 

“You feel so good.” He groaned, teeth against Gaara’s neck, panting, “Gaara…!” He drew out his lover’s name in a long moan as Gaara clenched around him, sucking him inside until he was finally pressed to the hilt. 

Gaara’s arms wrapped around Lee, his body bowed as his hands gripped at the hard muscles of the leaf nin’s back. “Move.” Came Gaara’s breathy command. 

Lee didn’t need to be told twice; he eased himself out before pushing back in, shallow thrusts at first that melted into something deeper, longer, drawing this out because if he didn’t he was sure to explode before Gaara was close. He idly bit at the curve of Gaara’s neck, inhaling the scent of him through long breaths, enjoying the feel of the creamy skin giving under his greedy teeth. 

“Ah…!” Gaara’s loud moan broke the steady sound of skin on skin and their heavy breathing as Lee pressed in deep, angling himself to nudge against that spot that made the Kazekage see stars. Gaara’s nails dug into Lee’s back, drawing up his skin as he felt his orgasm building, his eyes pinched shut, “Lee, I...nnn….Lee.” 

Gaara babbled nonsense, the tight heat of him pushing Lee closer and closer to completion. He vowed he’d make Gaara come first(or he’d do five hundred press ups!), growling into his lover’s skin from the effort it took to keep himself from giving in(Had he really made that sound? He’d have to be embarrassed later). 

Lee could feel the sand creeping further up his legs, the pressure more intense, knowing that if Gaara lost control he could very well crush him from the thighs down. Somehow that didn’t deter him, it made him thrust faster and faster, pounding into the other man despite Gaara’s half-worded gasps to slow down. The gritty feeling of the sand only seemed to enhance his pleasure, and his need to fuck Gaara senseless(but he had always been an adrenaline junkie, the thought of injury or death hardly bothered him). 

Without much warning Gaara dug his nails into Lee’s shoulder blades, shouting the leaf nin’s name(louder than he ever had before, Lee would note, and also belatedly remember the window was open), his body convulsed as he came, sticky semen hitting Lee’s chest and splattering down onto Gaara’s middle. 

The resulting inner spasm was enough to drive Lee over the edge; he thrust in deep one last time, biting into Gaara’s neck to muffle the shout just as the sand grabbed him so tightly he could no longer move his lower half(but thankfully didn’t crush him). He panted against Gaara’s skin as the afterglow settled into every nerve, causing his muscles to relax and suddenly the effort to hold himself above his lover was too great. 

Lee felt weightless and wobbly, a stupid grin on his face when he pulled his mouth away from the blooming bruise he had left over Gaara’s pulsepoint. He licked the angry mark, causing the Kazekage beneath him to moan tiredly. 

Slowly the deadly sand withdrew as Gaara came back to his senses, he was waving a hand somewhere to the right of him, directing the glittering sand back into the gourd. Lee noticed the blood under Gaara’s nails, and realized that he probably also had some battle scars from their love making. When the cork stoppered the oblong gourd, Lee felt it safe enough to withdraw from the spent man beneath him. 

With a hiss and a groan he drew his softening member from Gaara’s passage, his cum chasing him out and wetly running down Gaara’s ass to pool in the sheets. Gently he eased himself away from Gaara, nudging the Kazekage’s legs back together as he maneuvered over them to crash down at his side. Lee pulled up the dirty sheet and wiped at his chest before he reached over to clean down Gaara, all the while smiling at his lover who had yet to open his eyes and look at him(probably still recovering, Lee thought proudly). 

Gaara breathed evenly as he moved to lay out on his side, Lee immediately pressing in behind him, a strong arm reaching around his middle to box him in. He finally opened his eyes to gaze across at the dark of the bedroom, bringing a hand up to trace patterns on Lee’s scarred forearm; feeling relaxed and comfortable for the first time in a long time. 

“Stay with me?” Lee asked, not minding the warmth of the other body, even in this desert heat. 

Gaara breathed in the scent of their coupling, relished in the feel of Lee behind him, warm and alive; could feel his strong heartbeat between their bodies, and enjoyed the feeling of the other man dwarfing him. He could feel the dull ache in his neck from all the bites Lee had given him, but the pain was welcome(as rare as he was to feel it), it made everything seem more real, clear and in focus. 

Lee wasn’t bothered by Gaara’s lack of response; since the Kazekage hadn’t gotten up to move, he had clearly submitted to Lee’s request. He was feeling fatigued, but in the best ways, and had let his eyes drift shut as he nuzzled down at the top of Gaara’s messy mop of red hair. He breathed him in, humming in approval, “I’m definitely going to miss you.” 

Gaara didn’t want Lee leaving, but it was inevitable. He remained quiet long into the night, well after Lee had fell asleep(the dead weight of him and the loud snoring gave that away). He was trying to push away those dark thoughts as they invaded his mind, all the what ifs, all the fears. 

Before the sun would filter into their bedroom, Gaara would be gone, leaving Lee to wake up and dress alone as he prepared for his coming mission. 

But, for now, they were together, and for now, Gaara would savor this moment.


	2. Responsibilities

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s Notice: 
> 
> This chapter is mostly here to move things along and to give an insight on how Gaara is feeling and coping, as well as a view at his and Temari’s complicated relationship. That being said, I’ve never written Temari before so I hope she turned out okay, lol. 
> 
> I’d rather everyone leave what they know about the actual Naruto timeline at the door? It’s going to be alluded to, the changes I’ve made, but it might be difficult to follow if you expect the other Ninja war to have happened or Sasuke to have been off with Orochimaru the entire time. Yes, Sasuke did defect from Konoha, and was a wanted criminal for a while, but he never went as far as he did in the manga/anime, and that may be explained later(if he and Naruto become key players, or maybe I made a side story of them). 
> 
> I suppose Lee would be 18 in this story, Gaara is about 17 probably, and everyone else of the original Rookie 9 would be around the same ages. Tsunade is still Hokage, so that gives a little direction to the timeline, though it has been altered to fit my needs. Lee and Gaara probably have been dating less than a year? They live together, and have been intimate a handful of times(as mentioned). I’m trying not to peg down numbers too hard because I’m still fleshing out everything else, so I don’t want to accidentally paint myself into a corner. 
> 
> Anyway, enough talk, if you have questions you can feel free to comment or message me, but a lot of loose ends will be explained in the coming chapters. I’m unsure how long this story will be, but I’m looking forward to writing it. Thank you all for your continued love and support.

It had been three days since Lee was deployed. 

He would be at the border by now, maybe beyond it depending on how quickly he would have pushed his partner. His lover would rendezvous with the Konoha shinobi in the next day, if not already. In the report he had been informed it would have been Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke. Two of the strongest in Konoha, which had raised another red flag, and made Gaara rethink the nin he had sent Lee with. 

The jounin he had coupled with Lee had been around his age, fresh to the position, though adept in ninjutsu where Lee lacked. Gaara had chosen him because he felt he could fill in the blanks, and he knew the Suna terrain. Now, however, he was thinking he should have sent someone more seasoned.

It was a low grade mission, he had tried to remind himself, and sending a more seasoned jounin would have felt like favoritism.

Besides, if he had met up with Naruto by now, there would have been no one better to have Lee’s back. He knew for a fact Naruto would do all he could to keep his friends safe; more so since he knew just how important Lee was to Gaara.

The point was, there was really no reason to worry. 

But, he kept worrying, and he slept even less than usual. He’d wake up(when he did sleep) in a panic, and he often visited the places Lee frequented when he was in the village. He went to the training ground, the oasis, his office, and haunted their home when sleep evaded him, but it hardly helped. If anything, it made things worse, it made him realize just how big of a hole Lee left in him by just not being there. 

He felt helpless, and he couldn’t focus. 

Their relationship could still be considered new, but Lee had already infiltrated every corner of Gaara’s mind, had left his mark on every place he looked in Suna. There was no escaping him, even when he wasn’t there, and it was driving him mad. 

Was this what others felt? Was this how Lee was feeling apart from him right now? 

Empathy had never been Gaara’s strongest trait; he could barely process the few emotions he did express, let alone relate to feelings someone else was expressing. But, he felt maybe, that he and Lee were on the same wavelength finally. 

What would happen if--

“Gaara!” Temari had lost her temper, finally, after staring at her blank-faced brother for over ten minutes, dropping his formal title to try and get his attention. 

Gaara’s mint green eyes focused, flicking up from the page he was blindly staring at to his sister who was angrily standing before his desk. She had entered at least twenty minutes before, she had been talking about something, she had handed him this paper, but he hadn’t been listening, and wasn’t even reading either. That was apparent when his eyes met hers numbly, “What?” 

She knew it was foolish to startle her brother, so had tried to contain herself, but luckily nothing drastic happened from her breach of etiquette. Her eyes narrowed and her lips dropped into a frown, “I’m going to speak to you plainly, as your sister, and not your advisor.” 

Gaara set the paper down and leaned back in his chair, appearing smaller in the large seat. Mildly he noticed that his sister’s blond hair was pulled into a single ponytail and she was wearing a plain cream tunic sashed in the middle by a shock of royal purple. She had minimal makeup on and the sandals she wore were traditional, ornate, which meant she had recently came from a meeting, probably important if she had taken that much care in her appearance. Temari still had her battle fan strapped to her back, despite the ‘peace’ times she was never without her weapon, much like Gaara and his gourd. He made a gesture for her to continue, though his mind was still occupied, he tried to give her as much attention as he could. 

She exhaled, calming herself, trying to figure the best way to breach the subject. Her volatile sibling wouldn’t listen to a long winded speech, and trying to appeal to his emotional side would do little more than bother him. Temari knew she had to be direct and to the point(which she was rather good at), “You’re acting like a child. Lee isn’t the only person who lives in this village, and he’s hardly the only person who matters. You took this position to do good, to redeem yourself in the eyes of our people, and they don’t need you throwing their safety away over a foreigner.” 

She said this though they both knew why Gaara had been elected. It was why his lapse in control was startling, and Temari couldn’t let Gaara’s shifting mood be seen by anyone else. It could be dangerous for all of them if the council felt the Kazekage was slipping back into old habits. 

“I never--” Gaara’s hands were gripping the armrests of his seat, she heard the sand rattle now like a deadly snake in its gourd-shaped prison, the Kazekage’s eyes turning as hard as jade. 

Temari didn’t fear Gaara, not anymore, she knew he had more control than he ever had before, he was no longer the blood lusting child of the past; but it did take her a moment too long to temper against that look of his. That look she hadn’t seen in awhile and she decided to wisely interject before he could continue, “You’ve barely spoken to anyone, you haven’t sent out any correspondence to our other allies, and you haven’t even touched the paperwork on your desk.”

Gaara moodily settled back, conceding to her point, but hardly adding anything to it; still looking defensive. 

Temari decided it was a point in her favor if Gaara was listening, he wasn’t beyond reason yet. “This can’t happen, Gaara. He’s going to have other missions when he gets back. You can’t shut down every time he leaves, do you understand?” 

He clenched his jaw and stared at her, the dark rings around his eyes caused his look to seem more intent and angry than it probably had meant to be(or so she hoped). 

Temari sighed, looking away(because she honestly didn’t think she could keep looking at those eyes), “I know you didn’t have any formal training, but you should understand that the mission always comes first. Our village, our people, they always come first.” 

“I don’t need a lecture.” 

“You do,” She said, “You’re not thinking clearly. That isn’t like you.” Not the new Gaara anyway, he always measured out everything he did, everything he said. Even his relationship with Lee had been a weighty decision, but a decision he had thought over fiercely nonetheless. Now, it felt like he was losing his grip, and nothing had even happened yet. This was just life, this was just something that just about everyone went through, but Gaara was not adjusting well to it. 

But, what had she expected?

Gaara had been isolated for so long that this relationship, this burst of affection in an otherwise barren landscape had probably tasted like water after a drought. She couldn’t blame her brother for wanting love, and when he had approached them over his decision to start dating Lee, she had tried to be the most supportive(and had to step in when Kankuro only sputtered in shock). 

Honestly, she hadn’t entirely expected Lee to reciprocate. Also, she hadn’t really realized how much of a shock this would be to Gaara’s system. He appeared so young to her now, in a way she had never associated him before. It had been an oversight on her part, and she didn’t know how to fix it now. The damage was done, all she could really do was push Gaara back in the right direction and hope that nothing serious happened to Lee(if he was reacting this poorly over a considerably safe mission, she lamented to think about what the Kazekage would do if Lee was in any real danger). 

Gaara didn’t understand complex emotions, he was still learning to be a part of society and not against it, and was just recently coming to understand he was not only viewed with fear and loathing by the people of Suna. No matter what his siblings may have wanted Gaara to be, he would always be a tool and a weapon, that was just the fate of a shinobi, and none of them were above that. She couldn’t shield him from that reality, even if she wanted him to experience everything it meant to really be human. 

She could clearly see their error now; the dependency, the erratic behavior, his disregard for others. It felt a lot like when he was younger, when it was just him and the sand against everyone else. She could see his control slipping, he had tried to put up walls around him and Lee and it hadn’t worked, so it forced Gaara into this defensive tantrum. 

Gaara wasn’t really used to people not listening to him when he told them to do something. 

Temari was positive that her brother would have tried to persuade Lee to give up missions, maybe even going so far as to ask him to stay in the village permanently. She wasn’t so naive as to think Lee would ever agree, no matter his feelings for her brother. 

But, Temari felt she should have done more to stop this before it got out of hand. She had let her soft heart get the better of her, had let Gaara’s shy smile and nervous eyes sway her when she had told him to pursue Lee. She should have stopped it when Lee had landed himself in the hospital because of Gaara’s affections. But, even then she hadn’t, because Gaara had looked beyond himself with panic. He had been huddling in the corner of the room where Lee recovered, his eyes wide and when he had looked at her then he had called her ‘big sister’ and she just didn’t have the heart to deport Lee back to Konoha and request another liaison. 

Now though, this was getting dangerous, and not just for one man, but for everyone. 

“Are you done?” He asked, his tone flat, their eyes remained locked on each other even while Temari had lapsed into a contemplative silence. 

It was harder now to summon that image of a fearful Gaara huddling in the shadows, holding his hands out to her as he looked to be on the verge of a breakdown. The person in front of her now was stone faced and cold hearted, he had the eyes of a killer, and she was foolish to think that Gaara’s nature could change overnight just because of some new responsibilities and loving attention. 

“No, I’m not.” Temari said, “You have responsibilities Gaara, I shouldn’t need to remind you of them.” 

Gaara clenched his jaw, “I know what is expected of me.” 

“You know, yet this is how you’ve been acting.” She scoffed. 

“Nothing important has come in.” He said, his tone tempered, his eyes looking away from her now, towards the windows lining the wall. 

“Everything that has to do with our village or our allies is important.” She said, “You need to keep in contact with them. It isn’t a secret we sent out scouts, or that our alliance with Konoha is the strongest right now. That can cause unrest between other villages, especially if you’re not returning their correspondence. They could think a conspiracy might be happening if we close off, even for a few days.” She continued, “Something big might be happening and everyone is on edge, we can’t afford to isolate ourselves now.” 

Which, had been Suna’s policies in the past. Before the sand village was loathe to accept the help of anybody and it had cost them dearly before. Now, they had learned from their mistakes and would hold a hand out when needed or assist an ally when things got tough; but above all the Suna shinobi hadn’t really changed their ways. If worse came to worse, the knee jerk reaction was to protect their own, Gaara knew this. But, Lee, a foreigner, had become someone important, so important that the scales had been tipping and the Kazekage didn’t know where to place everyone’s worth. 

Gaara didn’t yet realize you couldn’t just weigh people like bags of rice and store them in specific containers. People were more complicated than that, and it was still taking him some time to venture out of his black and white world view. It was definitely why he was so conflicted now, and didn’t feel like having this conversation with Temari. “It’s been three days,” Gaara said evenly, “You’re overreacting.” 

Temari frowned, “I’m the one overreacting?” 

“I haven’t turned my back on our allies.” Gaara murmured, deciding not to continue further, his focused stare saying enough.

Temari had her hands on her hips, she appeared agitated. “I’ve been picking up the slack you’ve left. I’ve been attending meetings you should have been present for.” Her green eyes were searching for something in his blank expression, “You know how closely you’re being watched.”

He didn’t appear bothered by the reminder of just why he had the most prominent position in the village. He was well aware his status as Gaara of the Desert, the bearer of Shukaku, had tipped the voting in his favor; that the council thought he could be controlled, that he was merely a puppet on a string. Gaara was well aware of just how insincere people were; was aware of how deep their motives ran, and how darkness hid behind the best smiles. His paranoia, his logical thinking, and his raw power had saved Suna in the past and despite the rigged election, Gaara had prided himself on being a good leader. It was why the public had turned their favor to him sincerely, and it was why the council tended to call him more often for ‘meetings’. 

Gaara didn’t feel guilty in leaving those responsibilities to Temari; he had other things to think about. “Are you speaking now as my sister or as my advisor?” It was the closest Gaara had ever came to sounding petulant, to sounding childish, and it caused Temari to bristle immediately. 

“Gaara.” Her fists clenched at her sides, Gaara hadn’t looked at her. 

“If you know what should be done, as my second in command I would assume you could handle the basic day to day responsibilities. You expect me to send out every hawk personally? To sign every letter? To read over every piece of paper that passes over my desk?” The Kazekage spoke, his tone like a knife edge. 

Temari hesitated, “You know that isn’t what I meant.” 

“Isn’t it?” His cool green eyes shifted back to her again. 

“You haven’t been doing anything related to your station and we both know it.” Temari snapped, “You’ve been moping for days,” Moping might have been a hard word to use, at best Gaara was listless and indifferent. “I’m,” She hesitated before she continued, “I’m worried about you.” 

The Kazekage could see the emotion in his sister’s forest green eyes and reluctantly he relaxed his posture, trying to not appear as hostile; his bad mood has started to get the better of him. He could concede that he wasn’t as focused as he had been before since Lee left. He realized that he was succumbing to impulses, that he was lashing out at Temari because she was here when he had wanted to be alone. She was invading his space, she felt like an intruder, especially now when the world had turned grey again, his thoughts completely rooted on the leaf nin whom was absent.

The silence settled, the air between them was tense, and she noticed when the fingers on Gaara’s left hand began to drum along the armrest of his chair. Her brother did not usually show his agitation so openly, he didn’t give much away in terms of expression, posture, or nervous habits, but now she could definitely see the cracks in his armor and it only concerned her more. Temari blamed herself for not realizing this would happen, she should have came to Gaara the moment Lee left, to occupy his time, so this didn’t happen. Her oversight was costing them both and she couldn’t place all the blame on her inexperienced brother. She was careful when she spoke again, realizing it would be a moot point to continue digging at the problem they both were aware of. “I’ve arranged a meeting with the Mizukage.” Her tone was back to being professional, she gestured at his desk. “The paper I gave you has a breakdown of where you’ll be staying, who is going with you, and what is expected of you once you get there.” 

“I didn’t accept.” Gaara said testily. 

“I’m your second in command,” She said easily, “I accepted for you.” 

Gaara’s fingers had stopped drumming, his expression unreadable, but she hardly thought he was pleased. It was clear he had started to box himself in, to build his defenses up, and now she was trying to push him out of his comfort zone amidst his inner crisis over Lee being gone. 

“You need to get out of the village, I think a change of scenery will get your head back on straight.” She continued seriously, realizing that Gaara may have thought he could stay put in Suna and just wait for Lee to come back. That was a luxury he would never have, and she had to give him this reality check, it was the least she could do. “If these attacks are related, if we are facing a new threat, or even infighting between villages, it’ll be important to know who our allies are. You can’t afford to hideaway right now.” 

The Kazekage continued his silence, his expression unchanged, his eyes turned away from her again. 

Gaara was hardly a conversationalist on his best day, but somehow this quiet was settling like a real thing between them, oppressing the air in the room, causing her chest to feel tight. Belatedly she realized it wasn’t the quiet, but Gaara’s aura, that he was exerting control into the space, trying to intimidate her without even looking at her. He wanted her to leave, she was starting to realize just how dangerous this situation between them was becoming. Temari could still hear the sand, a white noise in the background of their entire exchange so far, but it hadn’t done much more than hiss. It gave her a clear indication of Gaara’s mood, that he was barely holding things together. “Kankuro will be coming here shortly to escort you out of the village.” Her tone was even despite the goosebumps raised on her skin, the hair at the back of her neck standing on end. 

Temari had pressed her nails hard into her palms to ground herself; she couldn’t be afraid, Gaara could smell fear, he’d lash out if she showed him anything but calm. She took in careful breaths, mentally taking stock of the space, where the gourd was, and the seconds it would take to release her fan from its holster in defense if things went south. 

“Today?” His tone remained unchanged. 

“We’ve lapsed long enough.” She said evenly, trying to ignore the bead of sweat that dripped down her temple to her jaw, hoping Gaara didn’t notice, “I suggest you pack what you need to and be prepared for Kankuro when he comes.” 

“You’ll take over my position while I’m gone.” It wasn’t a question. 

She wasn’t sure how to take that tone of his, nor how to interpret the cold indifference in his eyes. The room still felt suffocating, she resisted the urge to step back, “It is my job to act in your stead while you are incapacitated or out of the village.” Temari spoke, though wasn’t sure if Gaara was trying to get a response, he knew her job duties, he had given her the position after all. 

Gaara had stood up suddenly, the whine of the chair scooting across the tiled floor was loud in the space around them. He noticed when Temari had flinched back but didn’t react as she probably had expected him to. His bonds with his siblings had gotten stronger since he was young, but they were hardly completely mended. There had been a point in his life where he thought fear was the strongest emotion another person could have towards someone else. He had tried to provoke that feeling in as many people as he could, so they would feel something towards him, so they would recognize him, so they could validate his existence. He was alive, and his victims had reminded him of that in their final moments, he was truly alive. 

Naruto had been the first to show him a different view, and Lee had been the second. 

Fear was not something he coveted from others anymore; it actually bothered him to think he had pushed his sister to the edge, that she had become so wary of him. He was definitely losing control, but whom could he blame for it? Was it his own inability to control himself, or was it Lee’s affections making him act so out of character? 

When had the lines blurred? When had all these errant emotions crept inside of him? 

Gaara had flattened his palms to his desk, his body bowed forward, his shaggy red hair shadowing his expression(the sand was quiet now). “Temari,” He exhaled, “When will this stop?” 

The atmosphere had changed instantly and she hesitated a moment before responding, her tone soft, “When you let go.” 

The Kazekage wasn’t sure how to process her statement, but had taken the few minutes to compose himself before he looked back up at her, picking up the paper on his desk, “Tell Kankuro to meet me at the estate. I’ll be ready in an hour.” 

“Of course, Kazekage-sama.” She said with a slight bow of her head before she turned on her heel and walked towards the door. The long sash billowed behind her, before it settled at her ankles where she paused by the door. Temari looked over her shoulder at Gaara, “Everything will be okay, little brother.” 

Temari slipped beyond the double doors before the redhead could respond and Gaara was left to star at the space she had occupied before he finally walked around his desk, hefted the gourd up onto his back, and decided to meet his responsibilities head on.


	3. Scouting Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! 
> 
> Thank you for joining me for the third chapter of this fic. Yes, there will be quite a few OCs to push the plot along, but hopefully that’s not a bother. It’s just a necessary evil in this story of mine, and I have a bag full of OCs I like setting up in Suna, which you may notice from other one-shots of mine(that I will eventually post). For example, Lee’s assistant is always going to be Satsu. 
> 
> Anyway! Not much to prep you for before reading. I want to build up Naruto x Sasuke’s relationship, but they’re not the main couple, so it may or may not happen on screen, but I do plan to have one-shots(actually might post a one-shot regarding this chapter, haha). Hope you enjoy, and please leave a review.

“Bushy brows!” Naruto exclaimed right before he clapped his hands on Lee’s shoulders, grinning at him with the usual enthusiasm, the scars on his cheeks stretching with the effort. 

Lee grinned back, gently easing Naruto away from him so they could properly look each other over. Naruto looked much the same, but it had only been a few months since he had last seen him. He was wearing typical jounin attire; a black body suit with the olive green tactical vest on top(Sasuke mimicked his look). His bright blond hair seemed longer, more wild, or maybe Lee just hadn’t paid attention before, or it could be that he wasn’t wearing his forehead protector as usual, instead it was tied to a loop at his waist. “Been a while.” He amended, “How’s things in Konoha?” 

The blond shrugged his shoulders, his blue eyes sliding from Lee to his companion. The Suna shinobi that had accompanied his friend was medium in both height and build, and had a very forgettable face. He didn’t have any distinct markings or scars, his eyes and hair were a chocolate brown and his skin had a bronze tint. Naruto figured the guy was probably a top notch nin, but probably an asshole. “Same old, really. Aside from all the uproar about this attack, you know? But, it’s probably not anything, right? Just some bandits or something equally boring.” 

“This isn’t a social trip, Naruto.” Sasuke chided, he was in the background, trying to set up camp on his own, his back was to them but Lee could see the tension in his body. But, the Uchiha was always tense, so it was hardly alarming. 

“Yeah, yeah.” Naruto waved Sasuke off, “So you are?” He said, his eyes still on Lee’s companion. 

“Yuto.” The sand shinobi said simply, his dark eyes fixed on Naruto beneath the sheer veil that draped under his helmet for just a moment before they looked beyond him at the half made camp. “Lee-san, I’m going to assist Uchiha-san.” He brushed past Naruto without another glance once he got the affirmation from Lee to go ahead(Lee still wasn’t entirely used to his newfound authority). 

“Cheery isn’t he?” Naruto snorted at his back, folding his arms and offering a frown at the retreating nin. Sasuke had abandoned the tent to let Yuto ‘help’ and moved onto something else, their voices low and at this distance difficult to hear. 

Sasuke was hardly a team player on his best days, but he understood the benefit of a group, and at the least could manage to play well with others when it suited him. 

Lee offered Naruto a bright placating smile, “It’s not personal. Sand nin typically seem to be a no nonsense bunch. It takes getting used to.” 

Naruto ‘humphed’ as if it physically pained him when someone was overly professional. “Don’t they smile over there? Or laugh?” 

“Well,” Lee hesitated, scratching at his cheek. He could count on one hand how many smiles he had seen from Gaara, and just as many laughs. Temari tended to grin or sneer, and Kankuro usually smirked. His assistant Satsu was a little softer, but her expression was always composed, he didn’t think he saw her lips do anything but draw into tight lines when she spoke. As for the general population, well, he didn’t roam the village so often, but when he did he was met with serious faces. “Uh, not really.” He finished lamely. 

Naruto snorted, glancing over at Sasuke and Yuto before he turned his attention back on Lee. “So,” He said, a grin starting to break over his face again, “How’s Gaara?” The amount of suggestiveness in his expression was punctuated by a comical waggle of his eyebrows. 

Lee immediately turned bright red; even though their relationship wasn’t a secret, he still wasn’t used to people openly asking about it. Other than the stern expressions he endured from Temari and the commending grin from Kankuro, no one said much about them. It was also sort of a tense subject, as the Suna council had not been accepting of the match initially, not that Gaara seemed to care about that. Lee wasn’t proud that his lover had used intimidation to get the paperwork to go through; the whispers in the streets were one thing, but he wasn’t a fool to think their union didn’t have some political fallout. 

Lee’s friends had all been supportive(if a bit shocked at first), but their biggest fan still had to be Naruto, though Gai-sensei was a close second. He was aware however of the stern stare he’d get from Tsunade when he’d visit the tower; she probably didn’t approve, but couldn’t say much about it. At the least it did cement their status with Suna as allies, but it was also a dangerous thing to have one of their own in such a high position in another village. Lee didn’t want to think he wasn’t trusted, but their relationship had definitely added a blanket of unease between both villages. 

Normally when an active duty shinobi entered a serious relationship with another they were from the same village. If they were not, it was expected one would move to the other village and apply for residency and citizenship. Lee was currently living in Suna as his new job had dictated, but had been moved out of the guest barracks and moved to Gaara’s personal estate(a relatively new development); but his citizenship was with Konoha, which was completely uncommon in this sort of situation. It held a lot of implications, and none of them good, which was a reason Tsunade had hesitated before she had ultimately signed the papers that conceded to the union(under duress he was sure, as Gaara was still not used to being denied much of anything). 

Temari and Shikamaru’s relationship came to mind; the two of them only passing each other during missions in their respective villages. Their relationship from all angles that Lee had ever seen must be private, because he never saw them be affectionate, and often only witnessed them seeing each other briefly in public. Lee supposed that might’ve been what would have been expected of him, had he a mind to be discreet(nothing about him was discreet). But, unfortunately, Lee was the sort to tell the world about his feelings, and wouldn’t have wanted to live in the shadows(even if their profession sort of required it at times), which was probably a main reason why Gaara went public(he was never certain exactly if the Kazekage would have preferred to keep it under wraps). 

But, Naruto probably wasn’t interested in all those details. 

Lee would definitely gush about the good feelings, and their good memories, but he wasn’t the sort to divulge what happened behind closed doors and Naruto’s leering look suggested he wasn’t just interested in the hand holding and the innocent dates. Lee really didn’t want to start thinking about his lover in bed but damn the thoughts started to infiltrate his mind and he felt extremely overheated all of a sudden. “H-he’s good, if a little stressed.” He managed to stammer, though he and Naruto were the same height, he felt like he wanted to duck away from his stare. 

Naruto pouted, “You know that isn’t what I meant. I meant like,” He held his hand against his cheek to hide his mouth from view so only Lee could see him in a universal secretive gesture, “You know, your relationship, how is that going? I mean, I’ve never seen Gaara be affectionate with like, anyone, it’s still sort of a shock you know?” He finished with a grin. 

“It isn’t a secret, we, well...” Lee gestured vaguely, trying to find words, not usually one to get so flustered, but this relationship of his was new, and Gaara was a soft subject. He was missing the Kazekage already and it had only been three days; he should be enjoying his time with Naruto, and focusing on his mission, but his heart felt torn. “He’s a very admirable person. We’re doing very well together. It’s still a little bit of a shock to me as well.” Lee finished with a smile despite the burst of longing that bloomed in his chest. He knew it was selfish to be thinking of Gaara when he should be focused on the mission.

But, young love was nothing to be ashamed of! Gai-sensei told him to embrace all aspects of his new relationship, the good and the bad, so he would endure through his crippling longing. 

“I know it’s not a secret,” Naruto said, “But, the bastard is keen on having this whole mission be professional. He’s had a stick up his ass the whole way here and I know he’s been glaring at me even if I’m not looking at him now. He says I don’t take things seriously enough.” He said with an exaggerated eye roll. “He needs to learn to have a little fun and to actually visit with friends, you know? Well, not that he has any, I guess, aside from...well, you know how it is.” He finished with a shrug. 

Lee wasn’t aware of all the history between Naruto and Sasuke; but he was privy to enough of it. He knew the lengths that Naruto had went to bring the Uchiha back ‘home’, and had managed to persuade Tsunade to be lenient regarding his crimes. He knew that Naruto was technically the leader of the squad, and that Sasuke was on probation still, but an outside eye might not realize that at first glance. Lee also felt a little guilty he couldn’t even lump himself in as ‘friends of Sasuke’ because Naruto was right, the Uchiha isolated himself pretty damn well, and his rehabilitation back into the village was not met with fanfare. He had tried to be friendly, of course, but Sasuke was a man of few words and seemed bodily opposed to Lee’s polite conversation and enthusiastic challenges. 

Though, it seemed the Uchiha was settling back into Konoha well, if he had already made it to the jounin level with Naruto, and had been allowed to go on a mission outside of the village(the ban must have recently lifted, or perhaps it was why Sasuke was so tense, maybe it was his first one since being on probation). He was making strides, and he supposed he could be proud of him for it, even if his praise would not have been appreciated. Mostly, he was glad that Naruto had gotten his best friend back, those had definitely been some dark times. 

Lee also knew that Naruto was just needling at information about Gaara because he saw him even less; he was just concerned over his distant friend, and the unrest between the villages was something to worry over. He was sure Naruto just wanted to know what was going on, and the idea of politics was still something foreign and displeasing to him. Lee knew that the blond wanted to be Hokage one day, and would need to learn all the tricks of the trade, but it obviously wasn’t going to happen right now. “We’re really good.” He said with more conviction this time, because despite their differences and difficulties, they were becoming a strong pair together. Lee had never felt this strongly about anyone else before, and he was positive Gaara hadn’t either. They had their ups and downs, but that was merely another facet of life. 

“I still can’t really imagine it.” Naruto said cheekily, “I mean, you two are so different. But, I guess opposites attract or something like that? Well, I’m really glad you know! You both deserve to be happy, couldn’t have happened to better people.” 

“Naruto.” Sasuke intoned before Lee could say anything further to the blond. 

Naruto shot a sour look over his shoulder at the Uchiha who was sitting nearby the recently created firepit, “You know, you need to address me as ‘Captain’ when we’re on missions.” 

Sasuke smoothly ignored Naruto’s gripe, “If you’re done socializing maybe you can come over here and we can discuss the mission at hand.” 

Before Naruto could bristle, Lee had set a placating hand on his shoulder and offered a sturdy smile. “We do need to debrief each other before we continue forward, and you know this reprieve will be a short one.” 

Naruto shrugged off Lee’s hand and huffed, “Yeah, yeah.” He took a step towards their small make-shift camp, “Back to business then.” 

Lee approached the fire pit the group of them now sitting in a loose circle. Two tents had been erected on opposite sides of the perimeter, just big enough to fit two people but hardly luxurious. Their gear lay in satchels nearby, all of them had traveled light so they could make better time, even though the mission would span about two weeks, sacrifices always needed to be made, and nothing about the mission was supposed to be comfortable.

It was dusk, he could see the dark wash of purples and pinks that made up the sky just through the canopy of trees above them. It was almost strange being in such a lush landscape, after looking at sand for days(almost a year really if you wanted to count Lee’s time in Suna), it felt like he was on a foreign planet. Not that he could ever forget what his ‘home’ felt or smelled like, but it just felt different now, and he couldn’t explain why. 

“Well,” Naruto broke the quiet, his body highlighted with the orange glow of the fire, the shadows all around them growing darker, shying away from their light source. “Our trek here didn’t yield anything. We tracked a while at each checkpoint, but came up with a lot of nothing. We didn’t feel anyone following us, or anything like that. Nothing really to report.” He finished with a shrug, Sasuke didn’t offer anything further from where he sat off to Naruto’s right; his shadowed face a controlled mask. 

Lee rubbed the back of his head, letting out a sigh as he focused on the group around him, “Same with us. Nothing to report either. But, we still have days of scouting ahead of us, there’s bound to be something.” 

“Our plan going forward is to keep off the trails,” Finally Sasuke spoke, his deeper voice cutting over the hisses and ‘pops’ of the fresh fire. “We’ll make a wide arc around each area and come back to the center to reconvene. That’s the only way we can cover the most ground and really utilize our time.” 

“Also sleeping in shifts, yada yada, I don’t think we need to go over everything, we’ve all been scouting before, right?” Naruto said, impatient as usual, ignoring Sasuke’s chiding glare. 

“Yuto doesn’t know these woods, but I can brief him separately before our trek tomorrow. I also brought maps!” Lee said enthusiastically, “Though, I guess it’s a little hard to read a map while running?” 

Yuto didn’t seem bothered by his lack of knowledge, or that he was so obscenely out of his element and in the company of three foreign ninja. His face was composed as usual, his posture straight backed and ready, “I take direction well Lee-san, I’m also an excellent tracker, I can adapt to the landscape easily, you don’t need to be concerned about me.” 

Lee balked, feeling as though he might’ve offended Yuto with his statement, “N-no, that wasn’t what--I’m positive you’re an amazing shinobi, I was just, trying to…” He faltered, gesturing vaguely, his face red. “I’ll trust your instincts.” He finished stronger, though Yuto only looked at him with his usual impassive expression that was impossible for Lee to interpret. He really wasn’t good at being an objective leader yet, he mentally lamented. 

“It’s ideal that we don’t have deadweight.” Sasuke said pointedly, his dark eyes fixed on Yuto who didn’t seem bothered by Sasuke’s focused stare.

Naruto yawned loudly as if oblivious to the tension developing, “So, who takes first shift?” He asked, rubbing at his eyes before leaning back into a more casual posture.

“I will.” Yuto immediately offered, “It’ll give me time to look over the landscape and become familiar with it. I do not want to be a liability.” He said sincerely, causing Lee to wince over his folly of words earlier.

“Fine. Just a few hours between rotations. It’s best if we get as much sleep as we can now since we know it’s ‘safe’.” Sasuke said the word ‘safe’ as if it was a bitter thing. 

Yuto didn’t request the maps and Lee didn’t offer them; the sand nin had retrieved his short sword from his pack before he launched off into the dark woodland, not saying another thing to any of them. Lee was used to it, the brunette had been quiet almost the entire run there, he didn’t complain, and he didn’t make small talk. He knew he could trust him, he was a Suna shinobi after all, but beyond that, he didn’t have much of an opinion of him; Lee hadn’t known him prior to this mission. 

Sasuke was the first to get up from where he had been seated, absently he pushed at Naruto’s shoulder which resulted in the blond half-heartedly swatting him away(none of his attempts landed). “So, you staying up a bit?” Naruto asked, listening to Sasuke’s retreating steps as the Uchiha walked towards their tent. 

Lee looked to Sasuke’s retreating back before his eyes landed on Naruto, he offered him a sheepish smile, “I’m still a little energized from my run here. I think I’ll stay up a while. I’ll put out the fire, don’t worry.” He said with a nervous thumbs up. 

Naruto shrugged, offering another yawn, “Alright, but not too late. You can’t miss your shift.” 

“Now you’re sounding like a captain.” Lee said good-naturedly. 

“Tch.” Naruto snorted but offered a grin before he got up from his seat, dusting off his pants and looking over his shoulder at his tent which wasn’t illuminated from the inside out, causing it to appear uninhabited. Sasuke was a quiet bastard; for a second Naruto wondered if he had really went to bed at all, or if he was off somewhere in the trees. “If anything exciting happens, wake me up.” 

“Of course.” Lee said, and Naruto finally turned away with a lazy wave, tugging the flap of the tent open and disappearing inside. Lee could faintly hear Naruto and Sasuke speaking; their voices low, the sound of rustling fabric as they got situated. 

It was going to be a long night, and an even longer few weeks away from ‘home’.


End file.
